Why I Choose to Embody Abundant, Joyful Sexuality

If you are lucky enough to encounter me while I‘m in my “Goddess” mindset, you’re in for a treat. My inner goddess is the embodiment of abundant and joyful sexual energy. Why do I choose to embody this particular aspect of the divine?

I choose to embody abundant, joyful sexuality because it’s fun.

Dancing naked around the fire at Beltane. Flirting with a passing stranger. Making eye contact with others while I walk around the festival topless. Being open and excited about my kinks when the topic comes up. Celebrating my friends when they share their sexual adventures. Taking sexy photos to share. Finding new and creative ways to connect sexually with my partners.

When I’m having the most fun in life, I’m embodying abundant, joyful sexual energy. It makes me feel both powerful and approachable. Lovable and life-changing. I love the attention. It makes me feel seen in a world where I’ve often felt invisible.

Wearing my sexuality on my sleeve makes me feel both playful and like I’m mastering a difficult and dangerous skill. Some people climb mountains to get this feeling. I’m trying to reach the peak of my sexuality.

I choose to embody abundant and joyful sexuality because I can

I can because I’m lucky, a woman with less sexual trauma than most. It’s not zero. I don’t know anyone of any gender who is free from sexual trauma. In our society, sexual shame and repression are the air we breathe.

But I was lucky not to be raped or blatantly assaulted. I was never yelled at or beaten for innocent sexual exploration. I got into non-monogamy with my first husband, the first guy I’d ever slept with. I didn’t spend my young adulthood learning about sex by hooking with men on my own. I can have sex with strangers safely because I usually have people who love me nearby.

I wish that any woman with a high sex drive and desire for novelty could explore as safely. I wish having a man with me didn’t change the way other men are likely to treat me. It’s because of this privilege that I feel a responsibility to share my sexual energy with abundance. I want the world to know that someone like me does exist. That if we create a world with less sexual violence, more women could express their sexuality this way.

I choose to embody abundant and joyful sexuality; it makes me feel powerful.

Our sexual energy is potent. It creates new life. It’s so powerful that agents of control always seek to repress it. To create scarcity. Especially in women. I want to show the world that it’s a lie, created to control us. To make us afraid.

We are taught that if this force isn’t tightly controlled, it will run rampant. Destroying love, tenderness, and innocence. Devouring all that is good and pure in the world. Turning it all to lust and depravity.

When I started down the path of embracing my sexuality, I was scared of those things. Yet the world beyond the bounds of sexual propriety beckoned. My lust urged me forward. So I ignored the warning signs and kept going.

My experience was that those monsters didn’t appear as long as I armed myself with love. Because of that, I can express my sexuality without fear. A woman unafraid of her own sexuality is scary to those who want to control us. It makes me feel powerful to be feared by the same people who used to make me afraid my sexuality would make me unloveable. To be able to prove them wrong.

I choose to embody abundant and joyful sexuality because it changes people.

When I give myself permission to be this aspect of myself, it gives others permission to explore new things as well. People who fear or shame their own sexual impulses can get a glimpse of what it might be possible if they let go of some of that shame.

Men who were taught that their sexual desire is always a burden to women can see for themselves that it isn’t true. To me, it’s a precious gift. Women who were taught that they won’t be loved or valued if they share their sexuality too freely can see that I’m deeply loved and respected by the people in my life. Often because of my sexuality, not despite it.

What would the world be like if more people had access to an abundant and joyful aspect of their sexuality? I believe it would be a better world. One with less shame, less fear that our sexuality makes us unlovable. A world where abundance and joy in sexuality leads to abundance and joy in all aspects of life.

I choose to embody abundant sexuality because I want to help create that world.

This post was first published on Substack. You can follow me there for more of my writing on sexuality, spirituality, and life.